Welcome to Florida

satire

Welcome to Florida

We are ready to welcome you with open arms

florida is ranking 3rd in the country for mass shooting

1. California — 257
2. Illinois — 209
3. Florida — 147
4. Texas — 129
5. New York — 96
6. Pennsylvania — 92
7. Georgia — 89
8. Louisiana — 87
9. Tennessee — 84
10. Ohio — 80

only out done by California and Illinois with Texas and New York rounding out the top five.

Meanwhile the beloved governor Ron DeSantis was busy making his state a safer place for his loving citizens.

5 things to know about Florida's permitless carry law

By

• Lawrence MowerTimes staff
• Ana CeballosTimes/Herald Tallahassee Bureau
• Romy EllenbogenTimes staff

Published March 24|Updated March 24

TALLAHASSEE — When Gov. Ron DeSantis first proposed reviving the long-dormant Florida State Guard, he wanted 200 volunteers and a modest $5 million budget.

Then it grew to 400 members and $10 million.

Now it’s 1,500 members and a nearly $100 million budget — with police powers, helicopters, boats and, under one lawmaker’s request, cellphone-hacking technology.

DeSantis' State Guard vision: planes, boats, police powers

'Hate-inspired' leadership: NAACP is second group to warn against travel to Florida

Come visit the magic kingdom

just don’t say gay or try to use a restroom that aligns with your gender

unless of course you are of the cis gender

or you may find yourself visiting our other magic kingdom

Well lets not forget the safety of Florida children

I guess we should ignore these “minor” indiscretions from our soon to be republican presidential nominee.

I mean if Marion Barry could be forgiven for hookers and blow why not ignore Ron DeSantis hate mongering against marginalized groups of Americans.